Do You Really Care?

I wrote this poem several months ago, but have revised it to read how I feel today. Please take your time to consider an elderly relative, look through their eyes and ask yourself "Can I do any more?"

Drowning in my bath of sorrow, self pity to extremes,

anti-depressants still not working, wildest wishes in my dreams.

Steam running off the mirror, the bathroom fills with a cold haze,

In front of me I can see you, I see you looking at me in a daze.

Try as you may to lift my spirit, try as you may to reach my soul,

The dim light shows my reflection, to you I look completly whole.

My mind is never with you, my body is there without a soul.

they say an older woman is a young boy's dream, they say it is his passion

But not tonight my love as I strive to find you, but not in this face that stares without compassion

For inside of me is love and affection, for the one who truly dares,

to chase my heart in full flight, to nurse and stay with me all night

For I once was a beautiful woman, but now all that I feel

Is resentment of this old body, that time can no longer heal

You see it is not that I am ungrateful, but there was a time I bathed myself,

But now I have to rely on, and not always my choice, of hired help.

I once new love so tender and sweet, but alas my companion fell to his feet,

He left me a long time ago, I understand that little did he know,

How cruel life could be for me, without his love for all to see

I miss you every day, look for you in every way, search for you beyond the light,

but I can not cope without you by my side, my dearest one who had to die,

and leave me here all alone, to face this person made of stone,

who laughs at my wrinkles, and scars so deep,

I am just a joke, and then she puts me to sleep

In our bed, that we once shared, the hopes and dreams that we dared.

She take me upstairs and turns off the light,

I lye and pray so hard that tonight,

God will hear my calls and show me pity,

So that I can join in his world, so pretty.

I was such a dutiful wife, and all I ever did was strife

to love you until the end of time, I never wanted to say bye bye.